I write this in tribute to my husband. Why, you may ask? Well I sit here on a United Airlines Flight, my ultimate destination being Kansas City, KS. It doesn’t sound like a glorious destination however it is not the destination but what awaits me there—my friend, Leslie. As a mother’s day/birthday gift, David presented me with the go ahead to plan a trip to see her. I could write an entire piece about her and the connection we made in such a short time but I must get back to praises about my husband. As of late I have really been thinking about him and the relationship I have with him. We have been married for 11 ½ years and I must say we have been blessed with the things we need, sometimes want…we graduated (he did with my help) from college with no financial burdens, we have 3 wonderful children and yes, we still have each other…we own our home and have even been able to build a garage this year…we truly are blessed. We both come from families who strengthen us to various degrees and support us in all our endeavors, which adds to our already gifted life together. These are a few of my thoughts but those thoughts are about “us” as an entity—we complement each other and bring out personality traits some good, others not so good. Yet my thoughts drift deeper. My natural instinct is to think about what could be better, how he could do more, love more, understand more but what good does that do. Do I want him to do the same for me? I can readily admit his list, while he doesn’t voice it, would be twice as long as mine and so I take those thoughts and set them aside to make way for the true gratitude I have for him and what he does for me. Not only am I on my way to Kansas to relax and reconnect with a dear friend but I get to be gone for entire week. Granted we have family members watching the kids while he is at work but the evenings will be filled with making dinner, cleaning up dishes, jumping on the trampoline, probably some Wii time, song time, prayer time, teeth time, bed time (probably later than normal) and mornings beginning at 6am with Nicholas crawling into bed next to let him know he is hungry for breakfast---and this is just during this week. He gets the entire weekend with the kids and to prepare a talk for Alex to give in primary. I am so grateful he recognizes the need I have to be with friends. Yes, this is a big trip and he has been counting down the days and hours for me but he does this for me weekly. I get to go to the movies, get my nails and toes done, go out to dinner, talk on the phone, do my scrapbooking, and oh, so much more and he makes it possible. While I occasionally complain that all he does is the dishes, I am actually very thankful he does them. I hate to do the dishes and while it may not get done to my standard - the dishes are loaded and unloaded and I don’t have to do it. After a long day at work he always comes home with a smile and is ready to give me a hug with open arms and spend some quality time together. He wrestles with the kids, jumps on the trampoline, is bombarded with a myriad of questions, comments, stories and everything else that comes with having kids and still he smiles and has more patience with me than he needs to with the kids because by the end of the day I am on shut down mode and ready for someone to take over. I know this is rather selfish of me as I think about it more and more and so I find myself being even more thankful for him and wanting to make the necessary changes to show him the love I have for him. But even more so I find myself wanting to treat him as I would a friend. Now we both have different ideas of what a friend is and quite often I find myself treating him less than that and so as I make this tribute I commit to doing so. I truly have a husband to be proud of. I know have a lot more in him that I fail to recognize but as I put aside the natural tendency to think of me and make room for his wants and needs as he does for me I am able to see clearer than ever. I love my husband…he is my friend, my sweetheart and I will treat him so from this day forward. (I do reserve the right to make errors in my endeavor and ask for forgiveness and in so doing become even more appreciative of his love for me and my love for him.)
6 comments:
I think your husband is great too!! In fact, he is one of my favorite people...well you are too but since we are talking about David here :) I think all you said is put perfectly and it truly reflects him- and you because you are so good at pointing out the good in others.
that was so nice lili.
what a great guy!
That was nice!! We think he is great, too!
It's so important to put "eternal progress" aside periodically and just enjoy what you've achieved together. I'm so glad you have someone who loves you the right way.
Lili, this post brought tears to my eyes and enriched the love I have for you both.
I couldn't help but continue to read your other posts. Each is a piece of you, a very lovelee young woman growing, learning, and understanding as we all are trying to do.
I am impressed with your ability to express yourself...but heh, you've been doing it since the days you could stand up in your crib... after saying prayers, singing songs, tucking you in bed, and barely closing the door; you were out from under the blankets, standing up, and holding onto the crib rail, and so loud that we could hear you in the living room, you would carry on a conversation telling us all about your day and eventually, lay back down and fall asleep. At least we think that's what it was all about. We could've used a translator since it was expressed in baby talk. That's just a cute memory for me of you.
Kidding aside, I'm thankful to have you as my daughter and friend.
I love you,
Mom
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